Paul Blart
Paul Blart is a comical entity who works as a mall cop for the West Orange Pavilion Mall. He was played by Kevin James in Schindler's List, The Sixth Sense, Paul Blart: Mall Cop, Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, Paul Blart Mall Cop 2, Avengers: Endgame, Spider-Man: Far From Home, Paul Blart Mall Cop 3: All Dogs Go to Heaven (Scheduled to release on May 8th, 2023), Paul Blart Mall Cop 4: Revival of Grandma (Scheduled to release on December 12th, 2026), Paul Blart Mall Cop 5: Paul Time Travels Back To Vietnam (Scheduled to release on March 26th, 2030), Paul Blart Mall Cop 6: Global Anarchy (Scheduled to release on July 4th, 2033), and Paul Blart: The Last Mall Cop (Release date unknown). Character Biography Early Life It is believed Paul Blart throughout the years has taken on different names/personas. He was once named Scott Voss, a fat lard who was a biology teacher at a school known as Wilkinson High School. He then somehow defeated a UFC fighter, creating the most controversial and negatively-viewed UFC fight in history. He retired his UFC career after a steroid scandal, and disappeared, never to be seen again, at least as Scott Voss. He changed his name to Griffin Keyes, and began working at the Franklin Park Zoo, he befriended a talking gorilla named Bernie. They both later fell in love, until Griffin's human girlfriend, Kate, found out about his sexual relationship with the zoo's gorilla. Bernie instinctively murdered Kate, brutally, and broke Griffin's heart in the process. Afterwards, Griffin disappeared, and is now referred to as "Paul Blart". It is unknown who Paul Blart really is, many theorize of him being a extraterrestrial specimen, while others believe he is cyborg created by the government. If the government had created him for the mall, it must be for a reason, is he hiding something? Is there something deep inside of the mall that Paul is hiding? Hopefully, we will get answers in one the upcoming 5 mainline series Paul Blart sequels. Mall Cop 1 Paul has "always" dreamed of being a state trooper, but failed his police test, due to his hypoglycemia. Paul had a intense sexual relationship with a woman named Jonkong, who worked as the janitor in the West Orange Pavilion Mall. He temporarily broke their relationship when he accidentally got drunk and said the n-word on a live-streaming website known as BlogTV. A man began working at the mall with Paul, named Veck Simms. On a Black Friday, thugs dressed up as Santa's helpers led by (major twist) Veck Simms took over the mall. They planned to steal a small loans of millions of dollars from credit card machines at the stores. Paul decided to stop them because Jonkong and his friends were being used as hostages, not because it's his job or anything. He took down the thugs one by one. He almost saves his friends, but is caught by Simms and is forced to eat off his own arm (before then regrowing it later in the film). Simms tries to escape to Caveman Islands with Amy and his daughter Maya. He then successfully kills Veck and saves the mall and friends. He then gets back together with Jonkong, and later marrying her in the mall, because where else would he marry the woman of his dreams. = Mall Cop 2 Six days after the end of Mall Cop 1 and his marriage, Paul's wife, Amy, divorces him. Paul becomes emotionally unstable after this, but is comforted by his grandma. His grandma then gets hit by a truck and dies, leaving Paul alone with only his daughter Maya. Paul gets invited to a police convention in Los Vegas, at a hotel, Paul travels to it. A woman at the hotel named Divina Martinez talks to him, and he works his charm into her heart. During the convention, an evil old man with one blue eye known as Sans plans an evil heist, to steal the paintings throughout the hotel, because heisting a hotel during a police convention is a very smart idea. Paul is forced to do a speech during the police convention, and freaks out before it, going out to a garden. While meditating in the garden, a giant bird comes out of nowhere, and Paul fights the bird to the death. Sans kidnaps his daughter Maya, because it's not like that already happened in the first film. Paul then unites the Avengers and fights Sans' evil heist group. Sans plans an escape at the top of the building, but Paul Blart catches up with him, and they both have a very intense battle on the rooftop, before Paul finally rubs oatmeal-infused concealer on Sans' face, hurting him immensely from his intense allergic reaction to it, thus killing him slowly and painfully on the rainy rooftop. The last words he hears is from Blart, as he delivers his classic line, "Always bet on Blart". Paul then retires as a Mall Cop officer to be with his daughter, Maya. The end-credits shows him eating cake with his daughter, before suddenly, his daughter turns to dust. He screams into the air, with the scream being cut off, as the film cuts to black, following by the line "Paul Blart will return in Avengers: Endgame". Personality This funny fat man loves to play Gary's Mod in his spare time. He likes the funny face poser. When Paul is sad, he listens to XXXtentacion and jacks off to barely-legal hentai that features young, animated girls propagating communism (as well as other failed systems). Paul also enjoys banging sticks and rocks together like a caveman. Medical conditions Paul Blart has hypoglycemia and constantly needs sugar, which can explain his weight problems. He passes out if he doesn't get a certain amount that he needs. He also has a mild case of penis malfunction where it inverts sometimes, and he is also showing signs of brain cancer. Allies/60 Sacrificed Virgins * Maya Blart * Margaret Blart * Amy Anderson * Sergeant Howard * Leon * Chief Brooks * Pahud * Logan * Spider-Man * Barack Obama * Funky Kong * Tom Wallace * His Jotaro Kujo body pillow he stole from Donavan Jaffe Enemies * Veck Simms * Commander James Kent * Vixen * Prancer * Donald Trump * Paul Rudd * Thanos (Deceased) * Stewart Little (Deceased) * Jonathan Monheim * Evil Tom Wallace * Cancer Appearances * Schindler's List * The Sixth Sense * Paul Blart: Mall Cop * Jojo's Bizarre Adventure * Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 * Avengers: Endgame * Spider-Man: Far From Home * Paul Blart Mall Cop 3: All Dogs Go to Heaven (Scheduled to release on May 8th, 2023) * Paul Blart Mall Cop 4: Revival of Grandma (Scheduled to release on December 12th, 2026) * Paul Blart Mall Cop 5: Paul Time Travels Back To Vietnam (Scheduled to release on March 26th, 2030) * Paul Blart Mall Cop 6: Global Anarchy (Scheduled to release on July 4th, 2033) * Paul Blart: The Last Mall Cop (Release date unknown) Powers * Paul Blart can remove his name from any database, most typically the list containing Sex Offenders and people who have committed Treason. * Paul Blart does not have to pay his taxes because the IRS fears him. * Paul Blart can easily lift 400 pounds however, he cannot lift 401 pounds or the universe will shatter leaving only the West Orange Pavilion Mall in existence as a whole. * Paul Blart can say the n-word. * Paul Blart can grow fingernails at an above-average rate. * Paul Blart can summon a taser capable of firing actual lightning. * Paul Blart can stop time. * Paul Blart can shit out lily pads on command. * Paul Blart can stretch out his tongue to around 4 meters, and can grab you with it. * Paul Blart can perfectly sing "Crank That" by Soulja Boy. * Paul Blart can summon a golden Segway chariot sent to him from the gods which he used to seal Matt away in 1492 after sailing the Ocean blue * Paul Blart is the only person to ever escape SCP 3008 (Endless Ikea) * No matter where you are, who you are, or what you're doing, if you're in his mall, he hears you, he sees you, there's no escaping the Blart. Trivia * Paul Blart's full name is Paul Jesus Blart, the writers of the popular book ''The Bible ''accidently put down Paul's name as being Jesus. * Paul Blart was enraged when people called the year after his birth 'After Christ' (A.C.) when he wanted it to be called 'After Paul' (A.P.) * Paul Blart single handedly exterminated all instances of SCP 682 with his pinky alone *Paul Blart has over 13,000 toe-pics on his hard-drive *Paul Blart created Fortnite. * Paul Blart must sacrifice one virgin a day to keep his mall defended properly. * Paul Blart ran over a dog. * Paul Blart punched an old lady, she later died of internal bleeding. *Paul Blart is black Category:Characters Category:Heroes Category:Content Category:Mall cops Category:Mall Workers Category:Males Category:Paul Blart Mall Cop Characters Category:Paul Blart Mall Cop Category:Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 Category:Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 Characters